A year

& Its still not any easier
I never knew how long it would take..
I still have no clue

"Everbody Knows.But really no one knows"

If i could i would go back to do things a little different but would you?
If i could i would sleep on it but would sleeping on it change anything?
If i could i'd fight for us but you never did?
If i could all those times i saw you i would say hello but would you?
If i could i would have called you when my life was falling apart but would you?
If i could i would have been there for all of those moments we planned on but did you replace me?

It seems like all i ever could say is if but in the end im sad the way thingd ended but then again im not..


UGH so many things bugging me =(
- Failure
- Graduating
- Him
- Giving Bad Advice

Failure: :
Im so scared to fail. To mess up whats right in front of me. its like you dream a dream forever and finally the times coming where your dream is so close so now your scared to loose it or uncomplete it.. I hate evfen trying with some things beacause sometimes the risk isnt even worth it.. Like yesterday with colorgaurd i was like wow.. I shouldnt have even tried to do this.. & this one person is starting to hella irrate me beacause everytime she talks to me she does it in this tone that like makes you feel dumb and she reminds me of how much i failed and thats why in trying to avoid her and trying so hard not to say anything im going to regret. Trying never helps.. you can try and try but in the end your just setting yourself up for failure..

Graduating:
Its so close and i already want to be gone....

Him:
Im going to leave soon and yet your not there... What is a friend really?


Advice giving:
I give horrible advice.. I cant even help a friend beacause of my pride.. I wish i could just get over this phobia but i cant..



FML